All tagged Childfree

“I accidentally got pregnant and had an abortion during the pandemic. It was pretty traumatic but I was instantly relieved. Since then I’ve gone on to get my bachelors and masters degree. When I think of my future, I envision freedom, adventure and peace of mind. Two years later, here I am again with another unwanted pregnancy.” This story includes supportive comments from others who’ve had more than one abortion. Read more.

“The abortion at 39 was harder. I felt I “knew” most women my age would be thrilled to be pregnant. I felt it would be my last chance to be pregnant. I was with an economically unstable man. We had just moved in together. He said he was recovered but didn’t go to AA or anything. I was already depressed and feared postpartum depression. I did not want the baby.” Read more.

“I had my second abortion at age 42 and did have a moment of pause about it being likely my last chance to have a child. When I considered what I wanted my life to look like, and what I would want a child’s life to look like, they simply didn’t match up. I wasn’t in a place where I was willing to make the life changes needed to raise a child. I think every child born should be an intentional choice. People should be REALLY sure they want to give all that it takes to raise and support a thoughtful, kind human before having a baby.” Read more.

“I know being wanted isn’t a guarantee of a child’s happiness or success, but after I got sober at 25, I went back to school and got a degree in social work. I worked in child abuse investigations for 20 years, and I can’t count the number of children I saw who had been targeted, scapegoated, tortured, and vilified because they were unwanted. The most basic gift we can give children is to be wanted and loved. Every child should have that starting out.” Read more.

“I’ve been refused contraception from my GP due to underlying health issues, and refused sterilisation because I’m too young and apparently “will change my mind on not wanting children”. That’s a whole separate issue. I see abortion as a perfectly legitimate medical procedure to remove a tiny cluster of cells from your body, similar to getting your appendix out, or a cyst removed.” Read more.

“I tried to get used to the idea of having it, and in a moment of madness I told everyone. I called it good news. That same night I regretted saying it because I really didn't want it and neither did their support make me change my mind.” Read more.

“Traté de acostumbrarme a la idea de tenerlo, y en un momento de locura se lo conté a todos. Lo llamé buenas noticias. Esa misma noche lamenté haberlo dicho porque realmente no lo quería y tampoco su apoyo me hizo cambiar de opinión ”. Lee mas.

“Why couldn’t I, Mona Eltahawy, a woman born in Egypt to a Muslim family, write an essay under my own name, in which I say openly and without shame that I have had two abortions, that I am glad I had those two abortions and that had I become pregnant again I would have had another abortion because I did not want to have children? Why have I been able to risk my safety and my life by writing articles about a military-backed regime but I could not write about my abortions?” Read more.

“I found out I was pregnant about 2.5 weeks ago. I had a complete meltdown and was conflicted on what I wanted to do. For a while I was 50/50 — primarily because I felt guilt because if I decided to terminate this would be my second termination, and I felt so much guilt/shame over that. My last termination was a very long time ago, 10 years or so and I was super young and didn’t think twice about terminating.” Read more.

“I slept peacefully all night after the abortion happened. The next day a friend came to my house and we went for a walk and distracted ourselves and I didn't feel any pain! Super quiet and fast. The trauma is not the procedure, it is the stress of the moment you discover the pregnancy and when starting the abortion. Then, I found out that I am pregnant again. 3 years later.” Read more.

“Mi conclusión fue que probablemente jamás querría ser mamá, me preocupó el hecho de que esto decepcione a mi familia (todos mis hermanos y hermanas ya tienen hijos), pero la verdad es que yo no quiero.” Lee mas.

“My conclusion was that I would probably never want to be a mom, I was concerned about the fact that this disappoints my family (all my brothers and sisters already have children), but the truth is that I do not want to.” Read more.

“I never want children. I want to get my tubes tied but doctors refuse to do this because they believe I will change my mind when I am older. The first time doctors treated me like I didn't have the ability to make a decision for myself. When I told the second doctor that I didn't feel capable of being a parent she offered me counseling and support services, like I might change my mind. The third doctor made me feel like I needed to justify why I wanted it done. The fourth made me feel bad about myself and like I was a horrible person.” Read more.

“After my first abortion I saw several doctors to talk about my options. I had been on the depo shot, but I had adverse effects and had to stop getting it. I wanted to talk about sterilization, of course I was ignored. I was made to believe I just wasn’t old enough to know, that I would change my mind, and 7 years, and 3 abortions later my mind has never wavered.” Read more.

“I still think about my abortions from time to time. I don’t have any regrets. To this day my husband and I are the only ones who know and it will most likely stay that way. I guess I just want to let anyone who has had or will be having an abortion know that it’s okay. You’re doing what’s best for you. You will get through it. I understand. You’re valid. And you’re loved. And you have support right here if nowhere else.” Read more.