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When I first got pregnant, I was seventeen years old, about to graduate from high school and in a toxic relationship with narcissist boyfriend that I trusted and loved with all of me.

For him, keeping the pregnancy was never an option because he kept saying it would interfere with my studies but I knew deep down it was only about him.

I live in a country where abortion is a crime punishable by 25 years in prison.

Sex and all the sex talk is so very much taboo that most of the teenagers here, when they get pregnant for the first time, they don't understand what's going on with them for a while.

And it was my case too. I was so uneducated about pregnancy signs and all of that, that I thought my period being late for more than two weeks was something normal.

I had to tell my mother. She was the only one who could get me the help I needed. I had a surgical abortion the first time and it was dead painful.

I think the most difficult thing about an abortion is when you have to go through it all alone because you absolutely can't tell anyone because you know no one will understand you.

For my second pregnancy, I was twenty two and I was way more educated than the first time. When I saw the pregnancy test turn positive, I hated myself because I knew right there and then that I was about to have another abortion.

This time, it was a medical abortion and it was way easier to get through because it was at an early stage.

For quite a while, I lived with such a guilt of having had two abortions and kept questioning myself about my future fertility that I couldn't sleep at night.

I have read every article on the internet just to reassure myself that I am fine and that the two abortions did not affect my fertility and the stories on this website really helped me cope with myself because I saw that I was not alone.

What I learned from my experience is that having an abortion doesn't mean being careless and I know this might never happen where I live but women should be given the opportunity to chose what they want for themselves.