"My life would have been much different."

This story appears in the comments section of a New York Times article titled “Let’s Talk About My Abortion and Yours.”

I've had two abortions, one planned and one not planned but medically necessary.

Do I regret the first one? I can say yes, but I know two things: 1) my life would have been much different, probably worse and harder; and 2) having regrets does not mean I should be denied that choice.

The idea that abortion should be made illegal because women regret the choice is a straw-man argument of the right. As if women - adults - are not capable of making good choices, that the choice needs to be made for them, and by men no less.

Part of becoming and being an adult is learning that you will be faced with choices in your life that you may come to regret, that you are responsible for the decisions that brought you face to face with that choice and the outcomes, consequences, regrets or not, that life's choices lead you to.

Photo by  Sharon McCutcheon  on  Unsplash

It's understood in our constitution that women are independent adults entitled with life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness, whatever that means to them. That means that if I feel that carrying a fetus to term impinges on my life and liberty, then I have a right to terminate my pregnancy.

As soon as the law is repealed, it means, in essence that the government no longer sees me as an equal citizen to men under the law. This is the real argument of Roe: that I am an equal under the eyes of the law, and my personal liberty and decisions surrounding that liberty are only mine to make.


"My husband at the time was terrified of having a child."

"I was far from able to care for a child."