This story appears in the comments section of a New York Times article titled “Let’s Talk About My Abortion and Yours.”
In my 20s, I had 6 abortions in 7 years. I got pregnant while using condoms, diaphragms, cervical caps, and the sponge.
Furious, I had my tubes tied, and even then I got pregnant once more.
I felt I owed it to society not to burden the world with more people like myself - traumatized by a bad childhood that no amount of therapy seemed able to fix.
The only birth control method that didn't fail was the Pill, but the hormones made me even angrier and weepier and more impulsive, endangering my ability to hold down even a low-level job, without which I would be really on the skids.
Abstaining from sex was not an option - romantic connection was the only thing keeping me alive despite immense emotional pain, and by and large my serial-monogamy partners weren't in any better emotional or financial shape than I was.
I've been hesitant to talk about my abortions, since having so many seems morally reprehensible. Yet during that time I was trying to do all the right things, paying my rent and taxes, desperately trying to make a life worth living.
In time, my life has turned out quite well - I contribute to the community, nurture people in need, and have a happy marriage. What would have happened if I had carried a pregnancy to term?
Considering our society's lack of support for pregnant women, especially single, unstable, poor ones, imagining that motherhood would have turned me into a model citizen is magical thinking.
Abortion may be an unfortunate option, but it is necessary.